Central London psychosexual therapy

Who is psychosexual therapy for?

PST is for anyone who is having a problem with sex. It can be for individuals or couples, but if the problem only arises in sex with your partner, it is more effective to come to sessions together.

What do psychosexual therapists do?

In the sessions, we talk. Mostly we talk about what sex is like for you and how we can improve that. If you are unfamiliar with any aspects of sex, for example sexual anatomy, I will explain those. I give you exercises to do at home between sessions and you give me feedback on how they have gone.

What are the techniques used in psychosexual therapy?

Most sexual problems have anxiety at their root, so the programme of exercises you do at home is designed to rebuild your sexuality without the anxiety. We go back to basics so that you can learn to relax and enjoy your body and your partner’s without the pressure. The exercises are progressive so you gradually work towards being able to have enjoyable sex. I ask you to do the exercises three times a week and they can take up to an hour.

At the core of the exercise programme is a series of exercises called sensate focus. This was developed by Masters and Johnson in the 1970s, following their groundbreaking research into human sexuality. The sensate focus exercises are designed to help you get in touch with your sensuality, connect with each other and enjoy your bodies without the pressure of performing.

In addition to sensate focus, I will give you a tailored programme of individual exercises to address the specific sexual issues you are having. Depending on the problem in question, these might increase ejaculatory control or relax vaginal muscles, for example.

What issues does psychosexual therapy treat?

Psychosexual therapists effectively work with many issues including:

• erectile dysfunction (difficulty achieving or maintaining an erection)

• early ejaculation (also known as premature ejaculation)

• delayed ejaculation

• dyspareunia (painful sex)

• vaginismus (tightening of vaginal muscles that prohibits penetration)

• anxiety around sex

• loss of sexual desire

• difficulty achieving orgasm

• sexual impacts of menopause

• sex and disability

• sex and ageing.

I also work with other sexual issues, such as:

• porn addiction

• chemsex issues

• unsafe sex

• kink and BDSM.

In these cases, I use mainly psychotherapy, integrating elements of psychosexual therapy as needed.

What are the stages of psychosexual therapy?

We start with an initial consultation (or an introductory phone call first if you prefer). At the initial consultation, I learn a bit about you and what you want to work on in therapy. It’s also an opportunity for you to ask any questions you have and to get a feel for whether I’m a good fit for you.

The next stage is history-taking. If you’ve come as a couple, this is done individually. We go through a quite detailed questionnaire so that I can identify and understand everything that might be contributing to your sexual issue.

Based on the history-taking, I then formulate a diagnosis, a set of goals and a treatment plan. We have a session in which I go through my diagnosis and goals with you to ensure that you are on the same page. Then I start you on the treatment plan.

We then have weekly sessions until the treatment plan is completed and you have a sex life that you are happy with.

How long does psychosexual therapy take?

A typical treatment plan has 6-8 stages. If you dedicate the time to doing the exercises at home so that you can be moved on to the next stage at each session, that’s 6-8 weeks.

Sometimes it takes longer, for example we may need to go more slowly if you’ve experienced sexual trauma. Sometimes busy lives get in the way of the home exercises, so you need a bit more time. Sometimes there are relationship issues that need a bit of attention before we can move forward on the sexual side.

I work in an open-ended way, which means you can continue for as long as you want and are free to end at any time.

What is the success rate of psychosexual therapy?

PST has been proven to be very effective. For example:

• Zulfikaroglu (2026) found the combined approach of PST to be more effective in the treatment of vaginismus than CBT, botox injections, pelvic floor exercises or dilators alone.

• Frühauf et al (2013) conducted a meta analysis that found psychosexual therapy to be particularly effective in the treatment of female low sexual desire and inability to orgasm.

• Van Lankveld et al (2009) found sex therapy to be an effective treatment for erectile dysfunction, delivering significant improvements in sexual satisfaction and erectile function.

How much does couples therapy cost?

Psychosexual therapy requires specialised training and therefore tends to be more expensive than regular psychotherapy. Psychosexual therapy is available on the NHS but waiting lists can be long and the number of sessions may be limited.

My fees are set out in How I work. I charge just 50% for initial consultations and nothing for introductory phone calls, so you can get a feel for whether I’m a good fit for you without paying much.

How do I prepare for psychosexual therapy?

There’s nothing you really need to do to prepare. You might want to give some thought to what you want to address in PST, how long it’s been a problem, what you think might be contributing to it, and so on. But don’t worry if you don’t know the answers to those questions or if you haven’t thought them through beforehand - there’s plenty of time for us to do it together.

Can I do psychosexual therapy if I don’t like talking about sex?

Yes, absolutely. Most people are uncomfortable talking about sex, so a key part of sex therapy is helping you to become more comfortable communicating your needs, wants, anxieties, etc. After all, if you can talk with your partner about sex, that’s half the battle won.

I make that easier for you by talking about sex in a very straightforward way, without shame or embarrassment. I won’t push you to discuss anything you don’t want to discuss, but I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised by how quickly you become more comfortable with it.

What is psychosexual trauma?

Psychosexual trauma is a traumatic sexual experience that can impact a person’s later sexual functioning. It includes rape, sexual assault, incest and childhood sexual abuse. These experiences can lead a person to be very anxious around sex, to the point where their bodies respond in ways they don’t have full control over. For example, following rape a woman may develop vaginismus, which is the involuntary tightening of the vaginal muscles which makes penetration virtually impossible.

PST is an excellent treatment option for people who have experienced psychosexual trauma, as it addresses both the psychological elements and the physical aspects of sex.